I don't know, but lately I've been living my life like floating on water. The flow is taking me somewhere, but I'm not sure where. I have my wants and aspirations but they hit the wall and disappear. Sometimes I wonder if fate has chosen this path for me no matter how hard I swim against the tide, it's of no use. Things happen when they're meant to happen. And it seemed hardly fair that once you get something you longed for for years, suddenly all longing vanishes. It's anything but fair. But what can I do? I can't force myself to feel one way or another. Just have to deal with the mess. And boy, what a mess it is.